And I parted with much of my personal pride when I gave
up science for the development of Tono-Bungay. But my poverty kept me
abstinent and my youthful romanticism kept me chaste until my married
life was well under way. Then in all directions I relaxed. I did a large
amount of work, but I never troubled to think whether it was my maximum
nor whether the moods and indolences that came to me at times were
avoidable things. With the coming of plenty I ate abundantly and
foolishly, drank freely and followed my impulses more and more
carelessly. I felt no reason why I should do anything else. Never at any
point did I use myself to the edge of my capacity. The emotional crisis
of my divorce did not produce any immediate change in these matters of
personal discipline. I found some difficulty at first in concentrating
my mind upon scientific work, it was so much more exacting than
business, but I got over that difficulty by smoking. I became an
inordinate cigar smoker; it gave me moods of profound depression, but
I treated these usually by the homeopathic method,--by lighting another
cigar.
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