DICKENS, in one of his Christmas stories, tells us of an umbrella that a
man tried to get rid of: he gave it away; he sold it; he lost it; but
it invariably came back; despite his moat strenuous exertions, like bad
_incubi_, it remained upon his hands.
This strange incident does not come within our present treatise; it is
of the supernatural, and we are seeking to write the natural history of
the umbrella.
The man who, has an umbrella that has grown old in his service is a
curiosity--so is the umbrella. If a man borrow an umbrella, it is
not expected that he will ever return it; he is a polite and refined
mendicant. If a man lend an umbrella, it is understood that he has no
further use for it; he is a generous donor whose right hand knows not
what his left hand doeth--neither does his left hand.
A reform with regard to umbrellas has lately been attempted. A very
expressive and ingenious stand has been patented, in which if an
umbrella be once impaled there is no chance of its abduction except by
the hands of its rightful owner. A friend of ours, who owned such a one,
placed all his umbrellas in its charge, and went his way joyfully with
the keys in his pocket.
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