He was
a problem.
I took with me a taciturn humor that nothing could overcome; he respected
it scrupulously. I did not reply to his questions and he dropped the
subject; he was satisfied that I had forgotten my mistress. Nevertheless,
I went to the chase and appeared at the table and was as convivial as the
best; he asked no more.
One of the most unfortunate proclivities of inexperienced youth is to
judge of the world from first impressions; but it must be confessed that
there is a race of men who are very unfortunate; it is that race which
says to youth: "You are right in believing in evil, and we know what it
is." I have heard, for example, a curious thing spoken of, a medium
between good and evil, a certain arrangement between heartless women and
men worthy of them; they call love the passing sentiment. They speak of
it as of an engine constructed by a wagon builder or a building
contractor. They said to me: "This and that are agreed upon, such and
such phrases are spoken and certain others are repeated in reply; letters
are written in a prescribed manner, the knees adjusted in a certain
attitude." All that was regulated as a parade; these fine fellows had
gray hair.
That made me laugh. Unfortunately for me I can not tell a woman whom I
despise that I love her, even when I know that it is only a convention
and that she will not be deceived by it. I have never bent my knee to the
ground when my heart did not go with it.
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