"Very well," I said, "but before God who sees us, by the soul of my
father, I swear that I will kill you and that I will die with you."
I took a knife from the table and placed it under the pillow.
"Come, Octave," she said, smiling and kissing me, "do not be foolish.
Come, my dear, all these horrors have unsettled your mind; you are
feverish. Give me that knife."
I saw that she wished to take it.
"Listen to me," I then said; "I do not know what comedy you are playing,
but as for me I am in earnest. I have loved you as only a man can love
and to my sorrow I love you still. You have just told me that you love
me, and I hope it is true; but, by all that is sacred, if I am your lover
to-night, no one shall take my place to-morrow. Before God, before God,"
I repeated, "I would not take you back as my mistress, for I hate you as
much as I love you. Before God, if you consent to stay here to-night I
will kill you in the morning."
When I had spoken these words I fell into a delirium. She threw her cloak
over her shoulders and fled from the room.
When I told Desgenais about it he said:
"Why did you do that? You must be very much disgusted, for she is a
beautiful woman."
"Are you joking?" I asked. "Do you think such a woman could be my
mistress? Do you think I would ever consent to share her with another? Do
you know that she confesses that another possesses her and do you expect
me, loving her as I do, to share my love? If that is the way you love, I
pity you.
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