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Harte, Bret, 1836-1902

"Two Men of Sandy Bar; a drama"

You will be a witness to our interview.
Whatever befalls me here, you will explain to Mr. Morton--to
Jovita--that I accepted it as a man, and did not avoid, here or
elsewhere, the penalty of my crime. (Folding his arms.)
Slarbottle. Umph! The case is, as you say, a delicate one, but
not--not--peculiar. No, sir! Ged, sir, I remember Tom Marshall--
know Tom Marshall of Kentucky?--said to me, "Star!"--always calls
me Star,--"how in blank, sir, can you remember the REAL names of
your clients?"--"Why," says I, "Tom," always called him Tom,--
"yesterday I was called to make will--most distinguished family of
Virginia--as lawyer and gentleman, you understand: can't mention
name. Waited for signature--most distinguished name: Ged, sir, man
signed Bloggins,--Peter Bloggins. Fact, demme! 'Mistake,' I
said,--'excitement; exaltation of fever. Non compos. Compose
yourself, Bob.'--'Star,' he said,--always called me Star,--'for
forty-seven years I have been an impostor!'--his very words, sir.
'I am not'--you understand: 'I AM Peter Bloggins!'"
Oakhurst. But, my dear colonel, I--
Starbottle (loftily). Say no more, sir! I accept the--er
position. Let us see! The gentleman will, on recognition,
probably make a personal attack. You are armed. Ah, no? Umph!
On reflection I would not permit him to strike a single blow: I
would anticipate it. It will provoke the challenge from him,
leaving YOU, sir, the--er--choice of weapons.


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