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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 153, July 11, 1917"

You know the place and what it all means. At such and such an
hour we shall begin. Very well. Now this is what will happen. I shall be
the first to leave the trench and go over the top, and I shall be killed
at once. So far so good. I have arranged with the two lieutenants for
the elder of them to take my place. He also will almost certainly be
killed. Then the younger will lead, and after him the sergeants in turn,
according to their age, beginning with the oldest who was with me at
Saida before the War. What will be left by the time you have reached the
point I cannot say, but you must be prepared for trouble, as there is a
lot of ground to cover, under fire. But you will take the point and hold
it. Fall out."
That captain was an "as."
* * * * *
[Illustration: "OW D'YER LIKE BEING PUT ON TRANSPORT WORK, MATE?"
"BLIMEY! WHAT THE DOOCE MADE ME TELL 'EM I'D ONCE DRUV A DONKEY!"]
* * * * *
Domestic Intelligence.
"Owing to doctor's orders Mrs. ---- has been obliged to cancel
all her engagements during Baby Week.


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